The Illusion of Stagnancy

Written by APHP

July 5, 2024

One of the amazing things about life is how surprising it can be. When we think we know what’s coming, what’s right around the corner, life has a funny way of stunning us with its unpredictability.

Many of my clients have told me they sometimes feel a bit resentful about the ho-hum, mundane feel of their lives, often feeling put upon by everyone’s constant demands and stretched to their limits by the stresses of work, family life, caregiving, caregiving, and more caregiving. While they mostly feel grateful for the blessings in their lives, part of them sometimes yearns for something different (and less burdensome) from time to time.

For my own part, recent changes in my personal life sent me reeling due to their intensity and quick succession over the past year. Losing two family pets, attending weddings where we watched the next generation start their married lives, and watching my own children grow into near adults, has helped me bear witness to the circle of life and see my tiny place in the larger whole. It has been jarring to watch the things I used to sometimes resent slip through my fingers and drift away and I am remorseful for not letting my gratitude for those things outweigh my overwhelm and frustration while they were still in my life. I have learned a humbling lesson as I’ve been compelled to understand that the circle of life will continue rolling along and we only play small parts in the bigger picture. We can either choose to accept things as they are each day or push against the stage of life we’re in, the latter being a poor use of our time.

With all these events occurring in such a short time, my life has a very different energetic feel about it than it did a year ago. I know more changes are coming, but what I’ve realized is that things were always changing. When I felt stuck, thinking I was on a never-ending hamster wheel, everything was changing around me everyday. I just didn’t see those changes because they were happening at a slower pace, but those smaller changes brought me to the stage of parenthood I’m in now, to the loss of our dear pets (whose health had been declining for years), and to watching children I bought toys for get married and start their own families. Everything was always changing; I just didn’t notice because I was caught up in my own interpretation about what was happening around me, instead of opening my eyes and paying attention to what was really going on.

Part of what I love so much about Integrated Energy Therapy® is that it powerfully removes the energetic blocks that keep people feeling stuck and helps lift away the spiritual, mental, and emotional baggage which keeps them acting from their wounded selves. When you feel like your life is stagnating, nothing helps shake you out of it better than peeling away layers of emotional and spiritual scar tissue. Cleaning out a wound helps it to heal better and stronger than allowing it to heal without intervention, after all.

Suppressing old hurts and moving through our lives in denial, smiling and functioning while ignoring that which limits us, is not the same as living and operating from a healed place. How can we transform into the best possible version of ourselves if we’re hiding from the truth of our own pain? We can’t get rid of things which are concealed, but rather by uncovering and opening them up, looking at them, letting ourselves be overwhelmed by them and feeling what we need to feel, and finally removing them, sending them away from us without pain (which we have now released) and replacing them with love. We can send these hurts away from us with love because by the time we’ve done the work we need to do to release them, we understand that these events helped us grow and we are able to view them with love easily with our new perspective.

Looking at my own mistakes from a healed place, I realize that I can’t allow myself to wallow in regrets for what I missed along the way. I’ve learned the lesson of feeling gratitude for today (no matter what it looks like) now and will do better because I finally know better. Today, I encourage you to look at your life, noticing what’s changing around you, appreciating where you’ve been and where you’re going, knowing things will continue to change and that your role is to move gracefully and consciously through those changes, learning what you can along the way and treasuring the memories you’re lucky enough to make.

Dora Né

Integrated Energy Therapy® Master Instructor

Founder, Reading Restoratives Book Box


Published : Jul 5, 2024